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night-after-christmas.html
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<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<link rel="canonical" href="https://hardmath123.github.io/night-after-christmas.html"/>
<link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="/static/base.css"/>
<title>The Nightmare After Christmas - Comfortably Numbered</title>
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<a href="/"><span class="left-word">Comfortably</span> <span class="right-word">Numbered</span></a>
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<article id="postcontent" class="centered">
<section>
<h1>The Nightmare After Christmas</h1>
<center><em><p>Happy $HOLIDAY</p>
</em></center>
<h4>Thursday, December 25, 2014 · 1 min read</h4>
<p>‘Twas the night after Christmas in the Clause house,<br>And all you could hear was the click of a mouse,<br>Or the drop of a pin, or the sneeze of a louse,<br>Until he called out for his dear spouse.</p>
<p>“Mrs. Clause,” he cried, “I think it’s broken!”<br>“What?” she bellowed, annoyed to be woken.<br>“I’m locked out,” he said, regretting having spoken,<br>“I seem to have lost my login token.”</p>
<p>“Well, I did tell you your site’s a mess.”<br>“I have a weak password,” Santa confessed.<br>“I bet some crackers just made a good guess.”<br>“Perhaps we can track down their IP address?”</p>
<p>So Mrs. Clause began looking through logs,<br>While Santa whipped up some nice thick grog,<br>And soon enough, she found the clog:<br>“Who writes a database in Prolog?!”</p>
<p>“It looks like a simple DoS to me”<br>“Crudely done, from what I can see.”<br>“Seems like they stole your API keys.”<br>“Tracking these guys should be a breeze.”</p>
<p>So Santa called up an Elf for assistance,<br>(A big, macho creature known for his persistence)<br>He had ten years of UNIX experience,<br>And agreed to help on Santa’s insistence. </p>
<p>He fixed the firewall and flushed the cache,<br>And began to explore the system with Bash.<br>“Gosh, Santa, your code is trash,<br>Why are you using an md5 hash?”</p>
<p>So he patched the server (and ran <code>git commit</code>)<br>and did some digging and found the culprit.<br>Then he accessed the Naughty List with a rootkit,<br>And typed the name and hit “submit”.</p>
<p>He shutdown the computer and turned off the light,<br>Knowing that two wrongs might just make a right,<br>Yet he could not resist shouting, as he fled out of sight:<br>“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”</p>
<hr>
<p>Happy holidays from Comfortably Numbered.</p>
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